• Do you know of parents who are fed up with their child's behaviour?
• Do you witness many more road fights in your city?
• Do you have a boss who often flies into a rage?
• Do you find your partner to be totally unreasonable at times?
• Do you feel more teenagers are into drugs?
What is happening?
These are instances of what happens when, over a period of time, intelligence is given too much importance and emotional growth is ignored. Today, society demands that people excel in whatever they do. Cut-throat competition compels you to stay in the race and go well ahead of others. This means everyone needs to excel academically to be a part of this ever-challenging world. Often the key word is 'success' measured in monetary terms and the kind of work you do.
Emotional intelligence can be described as the capacity to be self-aware, be in control, and express one's emotions in a healthy and effective manner. It helps us handle important interpersonal relationships with empathy and better self-awareness.
An important factor that is not easily seen is that there is a definite link between emotional intelligence and success in life. Research has shown that emotional quotient (EQ) and intelligence quotient (IQ) are equally necessary for success in life, and the absence of either leads to some form of dysfunction. In fact, sometimes it is not your IQ but your EQ that determines whether you succeed or fail.
People who have high EQ:
Express feelings clearly and directly
Recognize feelings
Are not dominated by negative emotions like fear, worry, guilt, etc.
Understand non-verbal communication
Balance feelings with reason, logic, and reality
Act out of desire, not because of duty, guilt, force, or obligation
Are independent and self-reliant
Are generally optimistic
Are able to handle failures
Are interested in other people's feelings
These are just some indications of how a person with high EQ might appear. Emotional literacy is as important as academic literacy. It is a positive preventive tool, which gives an alternative to violence, illness, drug abuse, dysfunctional relationships, and societal conflicts. Having emotional intelligence is an asset that might not be really seen as useful for getting a job as would be intelligence levels and academic qualifications, but it is definitely what makes or breaks you when faced with critical life situations.
If you would like to discuss this further or need some help or support in this or any other area, our counsellors would be happy to help.